To say I’m feeling pretty rough is an understatement. My muscles ache from constantly bracing against the roll and pitch of the ship in bed, my stomach aches from an overdose of Korean seafood, and my head hurts from dehydration and lack of sleep. I calculate that I have had about ten hours sleep since arriving in Vladivostok four days ago. Once again I get one of the crew to carry my big bag down the perilous gangplank (which he does on his head!) and at last I’m standing on Japanese soil.

Unlike in South Korea, the order of disembarkation here is Japanese first, “Foreigners” second, then thirdly Koreans. I have no idea why. There are only four Japanese, one Russian and six other Asian foreigners on the ship. Immigration and the Ebola screening goes well, but I’m singled out for special attention at customs.

The officers simply do not believe that I could be here on holiday. After all, what sort of tourist from Great Britain arrives in a place like Sakaiminato with a beard and lots of luggage in the middle of winter? We run through some basic questions using laminated cards translated from Japanese into English, then they start to search my luggage. They clearly haven’t found what they are looking for, so they decide to take me to a side room for a full search and ask me more about my smoking habits. I consider telling them that I’m good friends with Paul McCartney, but decide better of it.

My tin of Coleman’s English Mustard powder is singled out as a possible narcotic, but everything else seems to be fine apart from (rather bizarrely) a roll of sealable freezer bags I’m using to keep my food fresh. There are no questions about my Handpresso machine or my medical kit containing emergency opiate based pain killers and needles. I wonder if they think the freezer bags are to distribute my mustard powder on the street in wrap sized amounts?

As they are still not happy, they conduct a full body search, and this reveals 10040 Korean Wan (£6.42) that I have carefully concealed in my right trouser pocket. They clearly don’t believe my story, which I try and explain further. I discover that the magic words are “writing a book”, as when I say this they decide to release me straight away! It’s funny when you see this kind of stuff on TV “fly on the wall” programmes the suspect is always very nervous and aggressive. I have been the model of charm and good gaijin manners, so I feel a bit hard done by. Anyway, I’m in.

When I get to the terminal building the Korean tour groups are crowding the only exit and my bus to the railway station is leaving. The driver kindly stops and let’s me and my snow covered luggage into his immaculately clean bus to take me to the railway station. It’s deep snow outside and wheeled bags are no use here. Note to self – get an international patent for strap on luggage sledge runners.

Everything runs smoothly at the railway station and I convert my JR rail voucher into a pass which entitles me to a week’s travel in first class (known in Japan as Green Class) on most types of train. I manage also to make some reservations and sit down in the waiting room to ahead of the arrival of the “manga train”.

The Eastern Dream is breaking with its usual schedule and stoping here overnight. I’m guessing this is to let the crew have a night off for New Year. I have booked to stay in a hotel that is an hour away from the port. It’s famous in Korea for its view of the sunrise each day, and I’m staying here for the biggest sunrise of the year – bringing in the New Year. Oh, and yes it’s also a ship, built on a cliff. The problem with my plan is that it’s not a unique one. There are in fact over a million South Koreans who have a plan that goes as follows – (1) drive to Jeongdongjin (2) find a hotel (3) find a restaurant (4) get stuck in a huge traffic jam after sunrise (5) drive home.

My secret weapon is of course Taegeun, so I get there with the minimum of fuss. He is in fact so keen to ensure I enjoy my trip in his country that he has decided to travel with me. He isn’t worried about where he ends up sleeping for the night and explains that it’s quite normal to just end up on a mat on the floor of the hotel sauna for a small fee. I’m touched by his kindness and resolve.

I now have to reveal to you a secret plan for this side trip. In 1996 a North Korean submarine sailed into Donghae port in a suspected defection attempt, with all but one of the crew mysteriously killed. It is now possible to visit this submarine. Amazingly, it is on display in a South Korean military “theme park” just 7 km from my hotel. This would normally take just 15 minutes in a taxi, but on the 1st January the estimate is over three hours due to horrendous traffic. It’s rum news having come this far, but I shall have to return again to visit it on a more sensible date.

Having just got off a ship, checking back into one on dry land plays tricks with the mind. The hotel even goes as far as to play the sound of waves and sea birds in its grounds to complete the effect. The check in staff laugh at us, and I discover that this is because they are amazed to hear that we have come here overland from Moscow.

I don’t have much time to dwell though, as its time for some local sushi before the other million visitors to Jeongdongjin have the same idea.

It’s not a meal for you if you don’t like lots of slightly strange fish based things. I seem to pass the initiation test by managing to consume a complete raw green chilli and a clove of garlic with my raw octopus. The owner acknowledges my achievement – my palate is determined to be almost Korean.

The restaurant has a lovely atmosphere with lots of families enjoying a New Year feast. The Korean children don’t know what to make of me. They come over to stare at me with incredulous eyes and their mouths wide open.

After dinner on the streets of Jeongdongjin it’s quite lively – this is a lovely Korean beach town with loads of places to eat and drink. I’m amazed to see that for New Year it’s possible to buy huge fireworks by the armful from street vendors. Their are piles and piles of three foot long Roman candles. This could get messy later on..

I finish up back at my hotel which has a very 1980’s revolving bar on the 9th floor. It’s a nice to people watch. Mainly Koreans and Chinese here tonight, and certainly no one from Europe. The staff are really kind even though they speak very little English. An unexpected pleasure of the revolving motion of the bar is that the Phillipino man playing the piano rather badly gradually rotates further away from my table..

New Year goes off with a bang, and then it’s time to enjoy a good nights sleep in a real bed without tannoy announcements, screaming children, drunk Russians or a sea swell. That is until the compulsory and non cancelable telephone alarm call for sunrise wakes me at 07.28.

It’s not an uncomfortable boat to be a passenger on, but the accommodation is rather spartan and hugely expensive. My bunk is in a room shared with seven other Russians (they seem to segregate nationalities) at a cost of $350 USD. Most people are in dormitory rooms of 30 or so, some in bunks, some sleeping on mats on the floor. If you want an en suite cabin it’s $800 USD. Madness!

I’m lucky to have Taegeun to talk me through the Korean buffet dinner. It is very popular with the Koreans on board, but the Russians are all absent from what feels like a supper club.

After dinner I’m treated to an introduction to Makguli. It’s a Korean rice wine, and it takes a couple of bottles for me to perfect the mixing and dispense. Taegeun is clearly a master and I am his Padawan learner in the science of this. To complete my Korean 1.01 cultural crash course, it’s an after dinner Korean sing along in the disco.

Sleep does not come easily to me once again, this time as I feel the hot and cramped conditions of the room to be pretty claustrophobic. I drift off in the early hours to be woken by a tannoy announcement at 7.00am in three languages, but not my own.

I then remember why my sleep has been poor – the Russians have been holding a full on party in a stairway near my room all night with some game Koreans. The Russian Far East really is a melting pot of nationalities that seem to tolerate and get on with each other. It feels like a “wild frontier” to me – where Moguls meet Russians, where Koreans mix with Chinese, and where the boundaries of ethnicity and language are at times blurred.

North Korea is now to be seen off the starboard bow and there is reasonable sea swell. We are pitching and rolling in the waves as much as to make me feel on the edge of being unwell. As if by magic Taegeun appears outside my room and says we have been delayed due to Russian ship movements in Donghae harbour. Time for breakfast.. Kill or cure.

It is supposedly Western, but the advertised choice (with a life like plastic model above) has many substitutions – my toast for a bread roll, my bacon for a hotdog, but I am blessed with some complimentary lettuce dressed in a Korean version of soy sauce.

On deck it’s a windy but warm day. The temperature was cold overnight but is now well above freezing. The hills of South Korea are getting closer out of the window of the cafe. I’m can’t put my finger on why, but I’m feeling great. It’s partly about the sunshine and warmer climate here, but also good to be arriving in a new country for the first time.

So just to update you on my progress. I took the East Coast train from Edinburgh down to Newcastle in the morning. A very smooth 90 minute journey. I travelled on the Aberdeen to Kings Cross train (seat 55, coach M for the log book), and there was a fine vista of sea views with a low winter sun peering over the hills behind me once we reached the Borders. Mrs Richards from “Fawtly Towers” would undoubtedly have been impressed, as any train closer to the sea would actually be in the sea.. “Toad in the Hole” was on the 1st Class menu, but I abstained as I was meeting an old friend for lunch in Newcastle.

I headed out to North Shields in the afternoon to catch the overnight DFDS ferry “M.V. King Seaways” to Imjuden. (Just in case you are a ship anorak, it used to be known as “M.V. The King of Scandinavia”). The ship is full of detailed models of the boat and I’m reminded of that scene in “The Spy Who Loved Me” where James Bond (Roger Moore, sans safari suit) suspiciously eyes up Herr Stromberg’s model of his latest supertanker (the one that swallows nuclear submarines). What a film – perhaps my personal favourite, as it is my favourite Bond and favourite Bond car. Don’t get me started, but if you were a small boy in 1977, seeing Q drive the Lotus Esprit off the ferry in Sardinia was pant wettingly exciting.

The boat is pretty comfy and has a mixed bunch of passengers, but on this trip mainly Dutch Christmas shoppers with bags of presents from various slightly dull British high street stores. I wonder how they market Newcastle as a glamourous mini cruise destination in Amsterdam?! Dutch men like a good smoke, and the decks have a gentle fog of rough shag and cheap cigars. No sign of the “Geordie Shore” community today, so they are either asleep in their cabins (unlikely) or out partying in Newcastle. I bet the DFDS marketing analysts have a proper segmentation of who travels when, but of course it’s a secret to you and I. I mention this as this time last year I recall someone actually managed to set fire to one of the cabins in an alcohol fuelled misadventure.

If you are wondering about “The Columbus Club”, sadly it’s not a secret explorers society but the ship’s main nightclub on deck 9. It’s well run and offers the possibility of a freshly made strawberry daiquiri or a half litre of foamy Heineken. I’m really only here to people watch, as this boat has a club within a club – a “deluxe” Commodore Club class with suites and a private lounge. I’m treating myself for not much cash and mindful that my next boat will be Korean, and I’m sharing a dorm room with seven other passengers in third class. I’m getting a bit mean in my old age and the £800 for a very simple private cabin with a mat on the floor felt totally wrong. More of the consequences of this decision to come in a few weeks time!

Finally, just in case I forget, just a note to thank you very much for reading my blog, and especially those who have managed to motivate and inspire me to crack on with this new route. Please do feel free to share it with anyone you think might like it..

(Apologies for some slightly rough formatting here – I’m trying to sort a few things out)